The Creative Salt

So… I complain WAY too much. I am being confronted BIG time in my devotions this past week…

Yeah… I complain to much and I do not worship the Lord or give Him praise through the trials nearly as much as I should.

Me thinks I am living a little too much in my flesh.

I read about David, and I read about Paul and I see that in the midst of persecution, from a dark dingy cave, these guys could worship and praise the Lord.

I’m like well, I feel persecuted. Fellow staff members gossiping about me, judging me, seeking to tear me down. I feel like I am trapped in a prison, stuck in a dark moldy cramped dirty disgusting office, no access to research sites on the internet, no access to itunes for music, no window, poor lighting, no drawing table, and constant interruptions making it impossible to focus.

All making for a dreary and depressing time for me, a time where the furthest thing from my heart is praising the Lord. I don’t even want to get out of bed in the morning, I can’t seem to get the creative spark going, I feel emptied, and exhausted from fighting, and just trying to survive.

How does one worship in times like this?

Then I looked to Davids psalms…

Wow.

I read Psalm 86, and I am humbled. How can I be as humble as David? Here I read about a King of an entire people, yet the first things he cries to the Lord is that he is poor and needy… He goes on to talk of his trials, yet finishes with claiming the wonderful things of the Lord.

Well, I feel convicted…

I complain, but I don’t rest my complaints and trials upon God, I keep them for myself. I am idle in my grievances. Well, so begins my lesson on giving my pains, frustrations, and trials to God in a better way and not try to fix everything myself.

Thought I would just share some of my simple revelations, that took me a bit to come to grips with ha-ha.

God bless this community and all who are in it!

So I pray and worship Him who is worthy:
God is good, in the midst of evil, he knows my heart, he knows my pain, he knows the trials I face, he knows the persecution that attacks me. He protects me, he guides me, he is faithful to me, and he loves me. He will deliver me, help me God keep my eyes on you, I am simple, I am foolish, and I am weak. Everything I have is because of you Lord, I am nothing outside of you, and everything in You. My heart is tired, and frustrated with your call, with your people, help me to cast aside my flesh, and seek to do your will first! May you be glorified in everything I do! Thank you for your faithfulness God! Amen.